1/28/2013 WWE RAW Report
– Tonight’s WWE RAW opens up with a promo for RAW Roulette. We get a look back at the Royal Rumble with John Cena’s victory plus The Rock capturing the WWE Title from CM Punk.
– We’re live from the Thomas & Mack Center in Las Vegas. Vickie Guerrero is backstage with three Roulette wheels. One for Superstars, one for stipulations and the “Vickie Vegas Challenge” wheel. Randy Orton vs. Antonio Cesaro is up first. Vickie spins the wheel and it lands on the “special guest referee” stipulation.
– We go to the ring and out comes CM Punk with Paul Heyman. Punk is pissed and storms to the ring, pushing the camera out of the way. Punk is on a rampage as he grabs the mic and hits the ring. Punk yells to cut his music and the crowd boos him. Punk says this is day 435 of the most historic WWE Title reign.
Punk yells about how he won last night. Punk says he is The People’s Champ now. The crowd chants for Rocky. Punk calls The Rock a cheater. Punk says the fans are just like Vince McMahon and The Rock. Punk says Vince screwed him worse than he screwed Bret Hart in Montreal. Punk calls it the Phoenix Screwjob and cries about getting screwed. Punk says he’s here to crash the party for The Rock tonight. The music hits and out comes Vince McMahon to the stage. Punk calls him a thief and a cheater.
Vince says someone who wants to remain anonymous will deliver video proof to him later that shows CM Punk was involved with Paul Heyman and The Shield last night. Heyman goes to speak and Vince cuts him off. Vince has had enough of Heyman’s crap. Vince says they will have a little chat later in the ring. Vince says this footage could result in Heyman’s termination. Vince tells them to have a nice party and heads back to the back. Punk continues to throw a fit as Heyman looks worried. Michael Cole welcomes us to RAW and he’s joined by JBL and Jerry Lawler.
– Still to come, WWE Champion The Rock will speak.
Randy Orton vs. Antonio Cesaro
We go to the ring for tonight’s first RAW Roulette match. Out next comes WWE United States Champion Antonio Cesaro. The special guest referee is The Miz and out he comes.
Back from the break and Orton covers Cesaro for 2. Orton with a suplex and another 2 count. Cesaro turns it around and takes Orton to the corner with body shots. Orton comes out of the corner with a big clothesline. Orton with a 2 count. Orton with a big backdrop and another 2 count. Cesaro takes it outside and works Orton over. Orton blocks s shot into the fan barrier and drops Cesaro’s back over it.
Orton with a pair of uppercuts on the apron. Orton stomps away and slingshots Cesaro under the bottom rope. Orton with another 2 count. They trade a bunch of uppercuts now. Cesaro gets the upperhand but gets backdropped out to the floor. Orton with a clothesline on the floor as we go back to commercial.
Back from the break and Cesaro back drops Orton as special referee Miz looks on. Cesaro goes to the top but Orton cuts him off. They trade shots and Cesaro drops Orton’s face over the top turnbuckle. Cesaro brings Orton back in the ring and covers for 2. Orton fights out of a hold but Cesaro scoop slams him for another 2 count. Cesaro with a chest stomp and gutwrench slam for another 2 count. Cesaro mocks Orton and applies a hold. Orton fights out again and ducks a clothesline. Orton blocks a suplex and unloads. More back and forth action. Cesaro with a flying uppercut from the corner but Orton kicks out at 2. Miz and Cesaro argue about the count. Cesaro turns around and misses a clothesline. Orton with the backbreaker. Cesaro with a thumb to the eye and Miz sees it. Miz pulls Cesaro off and they argue some more. Cesaro turns around to a RKO for the win.
Winner: Randy Orton
– After the match, Miz helps Cesaro up but lays him back down with a Skull Crushing Finale.
– Vickie Guerrero is backstage with Ryback and the RAW Roulette wheels. It lands on “Make Me Laugh.” Vickie tells Ryback to go make her laugh.
– Ryback comes out to the ring as we go to commercial.
– Back from the break and Matt Striker is in the ring with Ryback, Darren Young and Titus O’Neil for a “Make Me Laugh Challenge.” The contestants have to tell jokes to make the fans laugh. Whoever makes them laugh the most wins. They make a joke about Striker and the fans boo them. Ryback is up next. He asks what has 4 eyes, 20 fingers and is about to be unconscious. Ryback attacks and Young goes running. Titus fights Ryback but gets hit with a big spinebuster. Ryback nails the big clothesline and Shellshocked on Titus to end it. The fans chant “feed me more” as Striker announces Ryback the winner of the challenge. Ryback stares Striker down now. Ryback kicks Striker and lays him out with Shellshocked.
– We get a Hall of Fame video for Bob Backlund.
– Still to come, The Rock will speak. Back to commercial.
Bo Dallas vs. Wade Barrett
Vickie Guerrero is with the wheels as WWE Intercontinental Champion Wade Barrett comes out. He says he wants to fight Bo Dallas for eliminating him at the Rumble. Barrett says he will end Bo’s career tonight. Out comes Dallas to a decent reaction.
Barrett takes Dallas to the corner but Dallas turns it around. Dallas with arm drags and a big elbow. Dallas sends Barrett into the corner holding his jaw. Barrett comes back with a big kick and a toss into the corner. Barrett stomps away now. Barrett with a headbutt and a big boot, sending Dallas down on the apron. Barrett with more offense.
Dallas blocks the Bullhammer Elbow and turns it into a big slam for the non-title win out of nowhere.
Winner: Bo Dallas
– Vickie is backstage with Cody Rhodes. He spins the wheel and his opponent is John Cena. We go to commercial.
Cody Rhodes vs. John Cena
Back from the break and Cody Rhodes is making his entrance. Cole plugs Cena’s new deal with Fruity Pebbles cereal. Out comes John Cena to a big pop next.
They lock up and Cody applies a headlock. Back and forth. Cena hits a dropkick to the jaw. They go at it and Cena hits a fisherman’s suplex. Cody goes to the floor and takes a mic. He says this is a waste of Cody Rhodes and he’s leaving. Cena goes after Rhodes and brings him back to the ring. Cena hits his usual moves and then the Five Knuckle Shuffle. Cena nails the Attitude Adjustment for the win.
Winner: John Cena
– After the match, Cena takes the mic and talks about winning the Royal Rumble. Cena says when someone wins the Royal Rumble, the next step is to issue a challenge to the champion they want to face. Cena says this is his most difficult step. A “Cena sucks” chant breaks out. Rock talks about CM Punk and The Rock. He says Punk has been impossible for him to beat for two years now. Cena talks about his first match with The Rock that he lost. Cena says his once in a lifetime moment was stolen. Cena asks should he choose the World Heavyweight title because he has better odds. Or does he challenge either WWE Champion Rock or WWE Champion Punk. Cena goes to make his announcement and looks up at the WrestleMania 29 sign. The crowd chant for Rocky. Cena challenges the WWE Champion. Cena sends a message to Rock and Punk, calling them marked men. The Shield’s music hits and out comes Seth Rollins, Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns. They beat Cena down despite his efforts. Out comes Sheamus to make the save but they beat him down also. Ryback is out next to a big pop. Ryback tosses Ambrose and Rollins. He fights with Reigns but they beat him down and throw him into the steel steps. Sheamus comes back but they lay him out on the floor also. The Shield pose in the ring but Cena attacks from behind. They beat him back down as the crowd chants for The Rock. They hit the triple powerbomb on Cena in the middle of the ring. The Shield escape through the crowd, leaving Sheamus, Ryback and Cena laid out. We go to commercial.
– Vickie is backstage spinning the wheel again. It lands on Lingerie Pillow Fight but we see Tensai and Brodus Clay standing there. Tensai says no, he’s a monster and walks off. Vickie says there’s no way she’s doing that tonight. She tells Clay to spin another wheel and it lands on a Dance Off. Clay says he will inform Tensai of the change and walks off.
– Cole shows us a video with highlights from the Royal Rumble Fan Fest.
– We go to the ring and out first comes Brodus Clay with Cameron and Naomi. They dance their way to the ring as we go to commercial.
– Back from the break and Jerry Lawler is in the ring with Tensai, Clay, Cameron and Naomi. Tensai is wearing a robe. He says he’s ready to get this over with. Tensai takes the robe off and he’s wearing lingerie. Clay never informed him of the stipulation change. Lawler informs Tensai this is a Dance Off. Tensai throws a fit and picks his rear end again. Clay is up first and he does his usual dance. Tensai is up next but he doesn’t want to dance. Lawler talks him into it. Tensai starts dancing and really gets into it. We see Ron Simmons watching backstage on a monitor. He lets out a big “Damn!” and Tensai leaves the ring with his head covered in shame.
– Alberto Del Rio is backstage with Ricardo Rodriguez and Vickie Guerrero to spin the wheel. It lands on a Bodyslam Challenge. His opponent will be Big Show. Del Rio says anything can happen in Vegas. We go to commercial.
– Back from the break and out comes Ricardo Rodriguez. He introduces World Heavyweight Champion Alberto Del Rio for a Bodyslam Challenge. Out next is his opponent Big Show.
Before the challenge can begin, Show knocks Ricardo out of the way and attacks Del Rio. Show knocks Del Rio out with a WMD punch and then hits Ricardo. Show pulls out a roll of duct tape and tapes Del Rio’s arm to the middle rope. Show roughs up Ricardo in the corner and hits a big chop to the chest. Show continues the assault and makes Del Rio watch. Another big chop to the chest. Show takes Ricardo outside and tosses him into the fan barrier. Del Rio screams at Show and tries to break free from the duct tape. A “Big Show sucks” chant breaks out. Show slams Ricardo in front of Del Rio and taunts him. Show stomps away on Del Rio now. Show reinforces the tape on Del Rio’s arm. Show with another big chop to Ricardo’s chest. Show taunts Del Rio some more and drops Ricardo with a big knockout punch. Del Rio kicks at Show but Show blocks it and trips him. Show with kicks to the back now. Del Rio finally goes down after a big knockout punch from Show. The crowd boos Big Show as he leaves Del Rio and Rodriguez laid out. We go to commercial.
– Back from the break and we see what Big Show just did to Alberto Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez. During the commercial, Del Rio was helped backstage by officials.
Lumberjills Match: Tamina Snuka vs. Kaitlyn
Alicia Fox, Aksana, Layla, Cameron, Naomi, Rosa Mendes are at ringside dressed as Las Vegas Showgirls. The bell rings and they lock up. Kaitlyn takes it to the corner but Tamina turns it around and slams her on her back. Tamina works Kaitlyn over now. Tamina keeps control and keeps Kaitlyn grounded with a headlock.
Kaitlyn gets kicked outside and attacked by Aksana. Kaitlyn gets up and knocks her down. Kaitlyn fights her way in and unloads on Tamina. Kaitlyn with a bunch of rights to the face. Kaitlyn goes for a pin but the Lumberjills rush the ring and everyone starts brawling. Kaitlyn stands up and watches everyone else fight. Tamina is also watching from the apron. Referees finally clear the ring and that’s it.
– Up next, The Rock will speak.
– Back from the commercial and we see footage of The Shield beating down Ryback, Sheamus and John Cena earlier.
– We go to the ring and out comes new WWE Champion The Rock to a huge pop.
The Rock hits the ring winth the WWE Title and the crowd takes a few minutes to calm down. Rock says finally he’s returned to Las Vegas. Rock says tonight with the WWE Title is the proudest moment of his career. Rock says he’s thanked his friends and family already but now he wants to thank the fans. Rock brings up how CM Punk said the fans were nothing. Rock says those crap days are over. Rock says Punk looks like a homeless tattooed freak. Rock knocks Heyman and uses the Twinkie tits phrase again. Rock says we usher in a new era tonight – The People’s Era.
The Rock says everyone gets pie tonight. CM Punk’s music hits and out he comes to the stage pissed off, without Heyman. Punk says Rock is embarrassing the both of them. Punk says he made the title special and Rock is now flushing it down the toilet. Punk says Rock was handed the title like everything else in his crappy spoon fed life. Punk says if Rock had respect for himself, for his father and grandfather, then he would come hand him the title over. Rock challenges Punk to come take the title from him.
Rock tells Punk to come get it or stand up there like a punk ass bitch. Punk slowly walks towards the ring but stops. Punk backs up and says he will stand there like a punk ass bitch. Punk says he does things when he wants to, not on Rock’s terms. Punk proposes a rematch for this weekend’s live events. Punk says he will be there. And he will be back on RAW. But if that doesn’t fit Rock’s schedule, he will give him a rematch in three weeks at Elimination Chamber. Rock accepts the challenge and says Punk won’t be taking anything but an ass whooping. If you smell… Rock’s music hits and Punk storms off to the back.
– Still to come, Heyman’s performance review from Vince McMahon. Also, Sheamus vs. Damien Sandow in a Tables Match.
Tables Match: Damien Sandow vs. Sheamus
After the commercial, we see footage from earlier tonight where Damien Sandow did the wheel and chose a Tables Match. Sandow waits in the ring as Sheamus makes his way out.
The bell rings and they lock up. Sandow goes to the floor and runs around the ring. Sandow atches Sheamus coming back in but Sheamus knocks him down. Sheamus works Sandow over now. Sandow goes to escape again but Sheamus comes after him on the floor and attacks from behind. Sheamus throws Sandow into the steel steps and grabs a table from under the ring. Sheamus sets the table up at ringside and scoops Sandow. Sandow slides out and runs in the ring, out the other side. Sandow catches Sheamus coming out of the ring and dropkicks him. Sandow pulls a table out now.
Sandow uses the table but Sheamus turns it around and knocks Sandow down with it. Sheamus brings a table and Sandow in the ring. Sandow counters and drops Sheamus on his injured shoulder. Sandow stomps away and continues working on the arm. Sandow brings another table from under the ring and brings it in. Sandow shoves the table in Sheamus’ face as he charges. Sandow stomps on Sheamus’ arm while it’s trapped in the steel table legs. Sandow props a table up in the corner. Sheamus blocks a shot into the table and turns things around. Sheamus tosses Sandow to the apron and he hangs on. Sheamus misses a Brogue Kick. Sandow pushes Sheamus off the rope and they tangle on the apron. Sheamus comes back in the ring with a battering ram and knocks Sandow down. Sheamus grabs Sandow’s beard and works him over int he corner. Sandow with the leg sweep and Elbow of Disdain. Sandow sets another table on its side and slams Sheamus into it. Sandow puts Sheamus on a table and goes up to the top. Sheamus knocks him off and hits forearms to the chest. Sheamus tries to suplex Sandow through the table but can’t. Sheamus catches Sandow and hits White Noise through the table in the corner for the win.
– Back from the break and Jerry Lawler is in the ring with Zack Ryder, Hornswoggle, Natalya and The Great Khali for WWE Karaoke. Khali is up first and he has to sing Shawn Michaels’ theme song. Before Ryder can go, they’re interrupted by Heath Slater, Drew McIntyre and Jinder Mahal. They cut promos and Khali ends up dropping Drew with a big chop. Jinder gets taken out by Ryder. Slater fights with Khali but gets tossed. Hornswoggle climbs up top and hits the Tadpole Splash on Slater.
– We see Chris Jericho walking backstage. Back to commercial.
– Back from the break and out comes Chris Jericho to a big pop. The fans chant his name. Jericho talks about how good it is to be back. He calls the Rumble one of the greatest nights of his career. He thanks all the fans. He goes on and out comes Dolph Ziggler, Big E Langston and AJ Lee to the ring.
AJ and Ziggler remind him that he was forced to quit last year. A loud “Y2J” chant breaks out. Jericho tells Ziggler to put a leash on his little dog before it pees all over the ring. Langston tells Jericho to leave before he ruins his return. Jericho asks if the E stands for Langston’s bra size for his giant pecs. Ziggler asks Jericho why he is here and tells him to leave. Vickie appears on the big screen and says she is the person who signed Jericho to a WWE contract because it’s best for business. Vickie spins the wheel and it lands on “Strange Bedfellows.” It’ll be Jericho and Ziggler vs. Kane and Daniel Bryan.
Kane and Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler and Chris Jericho
Out come the WWE Tag Team Champions Team Hell No. Ziggler starts off and we take an early commercial break.
Back from the break and Ziggler is going at it with Bryan. Ziggler drops an elbow for a 2 count. Ziggler teases a tag but won’t do it. Jericho slaps Ziggler’s back to tag himself in and unloads on the champs. Bryan dropkicks Jericho and tags in Kane. Jericho shoves Bryan into Kane and the champs start arguing. Ziggler tags himself in but Jericho makes it looks like Ziggler hit Kane from behind. Kane chokeslams Ziggler for the win.
Winners: Kane and Daniel Bryan
– It’s announced Trish Stratus will be going into the Hall of Fame this year. Back to commercial.
– After the commercial, Vince McMahon comes out and says he’s ready to have some fun. Vince calls Paul Heyman to the ring. Heyman extends his hand but Vince doesn’t want to shake it. Vince asks if Heyman was in with The Shield or Brad Maddox. Vince asks if Heyman has ever lied. Heyman says he has lied every single day of his stinking life because he’s a promoter. Heyman says he doesn’t regret it because that’s what kept him alive. Heyman goes on and swears to Vince that he’s not lying now. Vince asks if Heyman is an honorable man. Heyman says he doesn’t know but he’s trying to become one. Maybe he can learn from Vince. Heyman says he wants to be here. Vince has the cameras do a close-up on Heyman’s face. He asks the fans if this is an honorable face, an honest man. The fans say no. Vince shows us some footage that was shot a few weeks ago in Northern California. It’s footage of Heyman walking with Brad Maddox. Heyman tells Brad’s cameraman to turn his camera off but he keeps recording. It reveals Heyman and Punk hired Maddox to screw Ryback at Hell In a Cell. Heyman also reveals they pay The Shield to do jobs for them. The Shield appear and surround Maddox. Maddox tells Heyman he will leave, Heyman tells Maddox to take the beating like a man. Maddox tells Heyman to tell Punk he’s sorry. Heyman tells Maddox to take this as a learning experience. The Shield beat Maddox down.
Fans chant “you got busted” at Heyman. Next they start singing goodbye to Heyman. Vince wants an explanation. Heyman says that wasn’t him in the video. Heyman says Vince can relate to being falsely accused. Heyman says his accent is very easy to imitate. Heyman says he is being set up because of jealousy. Because of his success with ECW and CM Punk. Heyman still insists it wasn’t him in the video. Vince asks fans if Heyman is lying and if he deserves to be fired. Heyman tells Vince not to do this. Vince wishes Heyman well in his future endeavors. You’re… Brock Lesnar’s music hits and out he comes to a big pop.
Lesnar hits the ring and the fans chant his name. Lesnar backs Heyman off and gets in Vince’s face. Lesnar touches Vince with his nose and it pisses Vince off. Vince tells Lesnar not to do something he will regret later on. Heyman begs Vince to leave the ring. Lesnar scoops Vince up and lays him out with a F-5. Heyman tells Lesnar no more and to stop. Lesnar bounces around the ring while Heyman asks him what did he do. There’s a pop for Lesnar as he exits the ring and Vince tries to recover in the ring. An ECW chant breaks out as RAW goes off the air.