Event: WWE Over The Limit Pay-Per-View
Airdate: Sunday, May 22nd, 2011 (Pay-Per-View)
Location: The Key Arena in Seattle, Washington

WWE Over The Limit Opener:

We get a quick graphic that lets us know that tonight’s show will be dedicated to the ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage before the standard WWE opening plays. Following this, we get a video package that highlights some of the main feuds heading into tonight’s event.

– The pyro hits and Josh Matthews welcomes us to the PPV proper. There are a couple of sport’s cars on the ramp, and there’s a ‘speedometer’ framing the tron. R-Truth is the first man out to the ring, and he makes his was out with no music.

R-Truth vs. Rey Mysterio

Truth has a mic and he tells Seattle not to boo him, and that they should be booing themselves. Truth says when he got to the arena today he didn’t have a parking spot. He says as a result he had to park with the rest of the people in the arena, and walk in the rain. He says that might work for some of the ‘stank-ville hippies’ in Seattle, but not him. He says he’s danced and pranced, and it’s gotten him nowhere, and he’s not dancing to the crowd’s tune anymore. Truth says he’s not playing games anymore because games are for kids. Truth says that Mysterio plays games. He comes out wearing a toy mask that everyone in the crowd is wearing now. Truth says Rey wants to slide into his spot, and tonight Truth will take his spot, and anyone else’s spot that he wants. That’s the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Mysterio’s music hits, and he ends Truth’s rant, coming out to a big pop from the crowd.

The bell rings and we’re ready to kick things off for the night. Both men lock up and Truth backs Mysterio into the corner, shoving him on his way out. Mysterio comes back with a quick kick, but Truth drops him with a big right hand. Truth sends Mysterio into the ropes, Mysterio ducks Truth and comes back with a kick to the chest before pulling down the top rope and forcing Truth to fall over and to the outside. Mysterio goes to the apron and launches himself off and into Truth with a big hurricarana to the outside. Mysterio sends Truth back into the ring and he follows, going up to the top. Truth knocks Mysterio down and Mysterio ends up in a tree of woe with Truth kicking away at his gut.

Truth beats on Mysterio in the corner until it’s broken up by the ref. When Truth goes back he gets a drop toe hold into the middle turnbuckle, but Mysterio’s advantage doesn’t last long as Truth sends him running head first into the steel ring post before Mysterio falls to the outside. Truth rolls Mysterio back into the ring and goes for a pin but only gets two. Truth tries to hold Mysterio down, but Mysterio works his way up to his knees, then feet. Mysterio works Truth over with a couple of kicks, but Truth comes back with a kick to the gut, and a big sit out front suplex, which is good for another near fall for Truth.

Truth rips at Mysterio’s face iun the ropes before kicking away at him, and stretching Mysterio around the ring post, holding his arms and legs and pulling back, forcing Mysterio’s stomach into the post. Back in the ring and Truth suplexes Rey, setting him down stomach first on the top rope. Truth goes to the top rope, but Mysterio catches him with a couple of punches and kicks before hitting a giant bulldog from the top. Mysterio goes for the pin, but he’s only able to come up with a two count. Both men get to their feet and trade blows, and Mysterio comes up with a kick to the gut and a big springboard splash, good for another near fall.

Truth tries to push Mysterio away, but Mysterio comes back with a kick to the side of the head. In the corner, Truth tosses Rey to the aprob, and he’s able to fight Truth off and hit a seated senton from the top, but Truth comes right back with a big spinning elbow that puts Mysterio down for a two count. Truth goes for the axe kick but misses. Mysterio rolls through and Truth catches him again, but Mysterio sends Truth into the ropes into 619 position. Truth avoids the 619 by going to the outside and Mysterio follows to the apron, but Truth pulls his feet out from under him and Mysterio crashes face first into the ring apron. Truth rolls Rey back into the ring and hits a weird looking move that must be a new finish for him (a sort of a reverse Russian leg sweep), as he pins Mysterio and gets the three count.

Winner: R-Truth

Following the match, Truth grabs a bottle of water, waits for Mysterio to get to his feet, and uses the bottle to hit Mysterio in the side of the head. Truth leaves Mysterio laying as he heads to the back without music, just as he came in.


Miz is standing backstage with Todd Grisham. Miz says the way he’ll get Cena to quit tonight is something everyone has overlooked, just like everyone has overlooked the fact that Cena has never faced the Miz in an I Quit match before. He says the people that don’t think Miz can win tonight are the people who thought he’d be fired three days after coming to the WWE, who thought he’d be the first unsuccessful MitB challenger, and who thought he’d never be WWE Champion, but he’s proved them all wrong, and he knows exactly what it takes to win. And by the end of the night, Cena will say I Quit, and Miz will say he’s the Miz and- Riley interrupts, saying I’m the new WWE Champion.

– After a bit of back and forth between King and Lawler that plays out like everything else between them over the past few months, we get a video package that shows Ezekiel Jackson’s ejection from the Corre, and his repeated attempts to get back at them.

Intercontinental Title
Wade Barrett (c) vs. Ezekiel Jackson

Wade Barrett is the first man out to the ring, and it’s worth noting that he’s by himself and does not have Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel in tow. Jackson is the next man out, and he gets an OK reaction, but neither man is blowing the roof off of the arena by any means.

The bell rings and both men eye each other for a bit. Jackson grabs Barrett’s arm, but Barrett breaks the hold. Barrett kicks Jackson in the gut and beats him into the corner with a couple of blows and a head butt, but when Barrett locks in a front face lock, Jackson simply tosses him away. Barrett tries to go to the outside, but Jackson grabs his arm and pulls him back into the ring to continue delivering punishment. Barrett is able to come back with a couple of right hands, but when he tries to whip Jackson across the ring, Jackson doesn’t budge, instead he throws Barrett over the top and to the outside. Barrett gets Jackson to chase him out of and back into the ring, but when Barrett tries to kick him, Jackson catches the foot and hits a big clothesline instead.

Jackson sends Barrett into the turnbuckle hard before taking Barrett to the opposite corner and laying in with kicks and punches. Jackson sends Barrett into the ropes and hits a big back elbow to take Barrett down, and the crowd really doesn’t seem to be enjoying this one. Barrett stalls the ref for a while before coming up with a big clothesline and sending Jackson into the steel ring post, shoulder first, two times. Barrett goes out to the apron and hits Jackson with a big kick to the head while Jackson’s head is next to the ring post. Back in the ring, Barrett pounds on Jackson for a bit before going up to the second rope and coming off with a big elbow drop, which is good for a near fall. Barrett locks in a rear chin lock, trying to wear Jackson down.

Jackson is able to power out of the hold, but Barrett fights back, getting Jackson up in position for the wasteland. Jackson fights out, but Barrett is able to hit him with a low kick and a pump handle slam, which is good for another two count. Jackson gets up with a big punch to the face that sends Barrett to the outside. Barrett gets up to the apron, and Jackson sends him headfirst into the turnbuckle before bringing him into the ring the hard way. Jackson hits a couple of big shoulder blocks before connecting with a splash in the corner. Jackson picks Barrett up for three consecutive bodyslams, then a fourth. Slam number five, and the crowd is finally beginning to come alive.

Jackson gets Barrett into the torture rack, and here come Gabriel and Slater to break things up.

Winner by DQ: Ezekiel Jackson

Jackson is able to fight off the Corre for a bit, slamming both Slater and Gabriel, but the numbers game pays off and it isn’t long before Jackson is laying flat backed on the mat.

Slater and Gabriel get Jackson up to his feet and hold him so that Barrett is able to administer and sick big boot. Barrett asks for his title, and talks a bit of trash to Jackson before posing with his belt, and teammates, to the crowd displeasure.


CM Punk is shown walking backstage alongside Mason Ryan. They walk into a dressing room to find McGillicuty and Otunga laid out. Punk says this is a good thing, it proves that they’re under Big Show and Kane’s skin. Ryan is upset as he thinks Punk doesn’t care about Nexus. Punk says he cares more about them winning the titles tonight. Punk and Ryan walk away, only for Punk to walk back and tell the two hurt members of Nexus to ‘walk it off’.

Sin Cara vs. Chavo Guerrero

The bell rings, and Cara’s special lighting for all of his matches goes into effect. After a lock up we get a bit of quick chain wrestling from both men, trading hold both standing and down on the mat. Cara hits a nice snap mare, and follows up with a beautiful headscissors that sends Chavo to the apron. Cara knocks Chavo from the apron to the floor, and he follows out with a beautiful corkscrew plancha, landing on his feet. Cara charges Chavo and ends up being backdropped, but Cara uses the ring ropes to go back toward Chavo and connect with another headscissors. Back in the ring, Chavo is able to catch Cara off guard with a couple of quick blows, but Cara dropkicks Chavo low, causing Chavo to hit the middle turnbuckle face first. Cara goes to the top and hits a beautiful moonsault press.

Cara goes for a splash in the corner, but Chavo moves and takes this as an opening, hitting Cara with a couple of quick strikes. Cara is able to come right back with a big dropkick and arm drag, but Chavo comes up with a simple kick to the gut to take Cara down before simply laying in with a series of right hands. Chavo begins working over Cara’s knee, wrenching away at the leg, but Cara is able to kick him away. Chavo charges Cara in the corner but he’s backdropped out to the apron. Cara kicks Chavo in the face and Chavo lands on the outside. Cara runs to the corner, and leaps to the top turnbuckle, then over the ring post and out onto Chavo.

Cara sends Chavo back into the ring, and he follows with a big sprinboard hurricarana. Cara psychs himself and the fans up before hitting a flurry of quick kicks. Chavo sends Cara into the ropes and Cara leaps right back out with a big kick. Cara conects with another arm drag, then a quick enzugiri. Cara, on the apron, makes his way back into the ring with a big springboard body press, but Cara can only come up with two. Chavo comes back with a head butt to Cara’s stomach, then he looks to try and lock in the Gory special, but Cara is able to counter out of it. Chavo goes for a belly to back suplex, but Cara fights out, comes up with a very sloppy headscissors that takes Chavo over, and goes for the pin, scoring the three count.

Winner: Sin Cara


Todd Grisham is backstage with both Christian and his opponent for tonight, Randy Orton. Grisham says both men have been mutually respectful, but it’s time to tell the world how they really feel. Christian says he’s not mad at Randy Orton, Teddy Long, or anyone, because Randy didn’t do anything he wouldn’t have done himself. Christian says tonight he’s going to win back his World title, and Orton knows it’s true deep down in his gut. Orton says he respects Christian, and this is a feel good story, but he’s beaten Christian before, and when he fights a feel good story, there is no happy ending.

In the Arena:

Alberto Del Rio’s personal ring announcer, Ricardo, is introduced, and he in turn introduces Alberto Del Rio, who makes his way into the arena in a Bentley.

Del Rio makes his way into the ring, and he seems a bit amused at the crowd booing him. He tells the crowd his name, even though he’s just been introduced. He says tonight he wants to talk about something no one knows better than him, and that’s destiny. He says he wants to talk about destiny because he personally finds the immigration problem in this part of the country disgusting, and that’s Canadian’s crossing the border every day. Del Rio asks the crowd not to get him wrong, he’s not angry, and he doesn’t even care, because he knows it’s their destiny to end up in a coffee house in Seattle, complaining about the weather or their miserable lives. He tells the crowd they may think he’s upset at not being in the WWE Championship match tonight, but he’s not, because he knows he could easily make Miz or Cena quit, and make them say ‘No mas, Alberto!’. He says it’s only a matter of time before he takes his place as the WWE Champion, and there’s nothing anyone can do, because destiny can no be stopped. He says it doesn’t matter if Cena or Miz wins tonight because it’s his time to be… But he’s cut off by Big Show and Kane, who make their way to the ring to a big pop.

Del Rio doesn’t look to happy about being interrupted. Kane grabs a mic and says that he’s already angry since the Rapture didn’t come yesterday, as he was looking forward to it. Kane says if Del Rio doesn’t get out of the ring, his destiny is going to be ending up just like Nexus from earlier this evening, and Big Show says that’s a punch in the face. Del Rio looks more than happy to oblige, getting out of the ring quickly.

WWE Tag Team Championship
Big Show and Kane (c) vs. CM Punk and Mason Ryan

Punk and Ryan make their way out to the ring to a bit of a mixed, although still subdued, reaction.

Kane and Punk look to start things out, but Punk backs away from Kane as soon as the bell rings, and he tags in Ryan instead. Ryan and Kane lock up and Ryan quickly pushes Kane back. The crowd is chanting ‘Batista’ at Ryan. Ryan comes up with a big shoulder block that sends Kane down to the mat. Kane kicks Ryan’s knee before hitting him with a couple of big right hands, but Ryan comes right back, scooping Kane up and slamming him to the mat. Ryan clotheslines Kane in the corner, before tagging out to Punk. Punk runs right into a big right hand before Kane slams him, head first into the corner turnbuckle and tags in Show. Show comes in, chopping Punk across the chest before walking across him back. Show holds Punk up in the corner again, hitting him with another huge chest chop. Show picks Punk up again and Punk turns around, so Show chops his back. Punk is able to come up with a low dropkick to Show’s knee, and make the tag to Ryan, who comes in with a huge clothesline to Show.

Ryan wears Show down a bit for Punk, but when Punk comes back in, Show is quick to pick him up in a bear hug, and tag out to Kane, who comes in hitting a big boot on Punk, before hitting a running clothesline in the corner. Kane drops Punk with a sidewalk slam that’s good for a two count. Kane goes to the top rope and comes off on Punk with a huge flying clothesline. Kane goes for a chokeslam on Punk, but a distraction from Ryan allows Punk to kick Kane in the side of the head and tag out to Ryan. Ryan sends Kane to the outside where he’s quickly ambushed by Punk. Ryan follows to the outside and shoves Kane back first into the ring apron.

Back in the ring, Punk tags in yet again and begins working on Kane in the corner while Show gets the crowd hyped up. Pukn hits the running knee in the corner, but when he tries to hit the bulldog, Kane shoves him away. Punk comes back with another running knee, before tagging out to Ryan. Ryan comes into the ring, shoulders Kane and runs him into the corner turnbuckle before hitting a big powerslam that’s good for another two count. Ryan locks in a front face lock, but Kane fights to his feet and Ryan turns it into a bear hug instead. Kane fights out of this too with a series of right hands, but Rya shoulders Kane again. Ryan goes to the corner, but Kane fights out of it, shoves Ryan into the corner, and follows up with a big suplex.

Ryan is able to tag out to Punk, who stops Kane from tagging in Show. Punk beats on Kane before dragging him toward the corner. Punk goes to the top rope and point toward the sky, going to a big ‘Macho Man’ style elbow drop, but Kane moves and Punk misses. Both men make the tag, and Show comes in with a huge clothesline on Ryan before absolutely squashing him in the corner and laying him out. Show sets Ryan up for the chokeslam but Punk is in and both men fight out, only to eat a double clothesline from Show. Punk is sent to the outside, and Kane and Show hit a double chokeslam to lay Ryan out. Show pins Ryan, and this one is over.

Winners and STILL WWE Tag Team Champions: Kane and Big Show

– In an extremely goofy move, there’s a ‘dream segment’ showing what it might be like if President Obama held a press conference about WWE Capital Punishment. This is real footage of Obama interspersed with questions being asked about WWE Capital Punishment. This is a terrible segment.

WWE Divas Championship
Brie Bella (c) vs. Kelly Kelly

The bell rings, and Nikki distracts Kelly, allowing Brie to khit a quick kick off the bat. Kelly is able to come back quickly, wrapping her legs around Brie’s head and choking her. Kelly pushes her behind into Brie’s face repeatedly, but she’s sent to the outside where she’s attacked by Nikki. While trying to recover, Kelly has her hand stomped on by Brie. Brie brings Kelly back into the ring and goes for a quick pin but she’s only able to get a two count. Brie begins working over Kelly’s arm, wrenching it and slamming Kelly’s face into the canvas before locking in an arm bar.

Kelly tries to fight out of the submission, but Brie is relentless, wrenching away at her arm and shoulder. Kelly is able to fight up to her knees and out of the hold, eventually getting to her feet and hitting a very sloppy Thesz press. Kelly hits a kick to Brie, before slamming her face repeatedly into the mat. Kelly goes for the pin, but she’s only able to get two. Kelly begins stomping away on Brie, but the ref pulls her away and Nikki makes her way into the ring. Nikki hits a quick face buster, and pins Kelly, getting the three count.

Winner: Brie Bella (kind of)

The announcers mentioned that Kharma had been stalking Kelly but didn’t show her face tonight.

– Cole makes his way to the back, taunting Lawler on the way, and thank God we won’t have to have his commentary for hopefully the rest of the night. This segues right into a video package for the World Heavyweight Championship match, showing the events that have led up to this match.

World Heavyweight Championship
Randy Orton (c) vs. Christian

Both men circle before locking up and Christian goes for a quick roll up, trying to end it early, but Orton kicks right out. Another lock up and Orton locks in a side headlock, wrenching away. Christian fights out but walks right into a big shoulderblock that’s good for a near fall. Orton locks in another side headlock. Christian is able to fight out of it again, hitting Orton with a shoulderblock of his own. Christian goes up to the middle rope and hits a big dropkick that puts Orton down for a two count. Christian slaps Orton in the mouth, but walks into a big back elbow from Orton. Christian retaliates by back dropping Orton over the top rope and to the outside, and following up with a big dropkick to the outside through the middle and bottom ropes. Christian goes to the outside, hits Orton with a couple of rights, then rolls him back into the ring.

Christian picks Orton up for a big slam, then he locks in a rear chin lock. Orton is able to fight up to his feet and out of the submission, but he’s caught with a quick dropkick from Christian which is good for another two count. Christian hits a snap mare and locks in another rear chin lock.

Orton is able to fight out of the hold again and he comes back with a big standing dropkick. When both men get back to their feet Christian slaps Orton across the face and goes up to the top turnbuckle. Orton stops Christian, seating him on the top turnbuckle and laying into him with a series of right hands. Orton goes up too and takes Christian off with a giant superplex. Orton pins Christian, but he’s still only able to come up with a two count.

Orton is the first man up to his feet, and he lays into Christian with two big European uppercuts, but on a third attempt, Christian reverses into a backslide for a two count. Orton comes back with another big clothesline, but Christian retaliates right away with a huge spinebuster that’s good for a two count.

Both men get to their feet and begin trading blows in the middle of the ring. The crowd seems to be getting more and more begind Christian. Christian hits a big reverse DDT, but it’s still not enough to hold Orton down for three. Christian goes back up to the middle rope and leaps off, but Orton catches him and rolls him up for two. Christian reverses it and gets a two count of his own. Orton pops Christian with a big European uppercut, and Christian is quick to come back with an arm drag. Christian goes to the outside and tries to come up with a big right hand, but Orton fights it off and almost connects with his rope assisted DDT. Christian fights it off, goes to the top turnbuckle, and leaps off, hitting a big flying head butt, pinning Orton and getting a two count.

Christian gets back to his feet first, but Orton comes up with another European uppercut, and his signature backbreaker, which is good to keep Christian down for two. Orton begins stomping away at Christian’s joints, wearing him down even further before hitting a big knee drop and going for another cover, getting another two count. Orton picks Christian up to his feet and Christian looks to lock in the killswitch. Orton fights out and goes for the RKO. Christian fights out and goes for the killswitch again, but Orton fights out and locks in the Billy Goat’s Curse (Colt Cabana’s finishing submission). Christian is able to make it into the ropes to force a break.

The crowd is chanting for Christian. Orton throws Christian into the corner, but walks into a big kick. Christian fakes Orton out, causing Orton to prematurely go for the RKO, and Christian jumps off the middle rope, rolling Orton up for a two count. Orton sends Christian into the corner, and Christian goes for hit signature kick, but Orton blocks it, and hits his rope assisted DDT instead. Orton pins Christian, but Captain Charisma refuses to stay down.

Orton falls to the mat and begins psyching himself up for the RKO. Christian makes it to his feet and Orton goes for the RKO, but Christian pushes him away and Orton falls to the mat. Christian begins calling for the spear. Orton stands up, but when Christian goes for the spear Orton connects with the snap powerslam, but it’s still only enough for a two count.

Christian struggles to get to his feet, so Orton sets up for the punt. Orton begins going for it, but he stops himself. Orton resets himself, but when he goes for the punt, Christian connects with the spear but he still can’t keep Orton down for a three count. Christian claps his hands to get the crowd behind him, and when Orton gets to his feet, both men go for their finishers unsuccessfully. Christian goes for it again, but Orton fights out, and connects with the RKO. Orton pins Christian, and this one is over.

Winner and STILL World Heavyweight Champion: Randy Orton

After the match, Orton celebrates with his title while Christian looks on disappointedly from the mat. Orton begins to leave the ring, but he stops on his way out, instead turning back to Christian. Orton picks Christian up to his feet, but Christian turns away, heading out of the ring before walking right back in. Christian holds out his hand and both men shake, but Christian still looks very upset as he makes his way out of the ring and to the back.

Kiss My Foot Match
Jerry Lawler vs. Michael Cole

We get a video package highlighting the events of this seemingly unending program between these two men, that hopefully will be blown off tonight.

Jerry Lawler is the first man to make his way out to the ring, and he gets a good reaction from the crowd. Michael Cole is out to the ring next, and he’s still in his suit, and limping as he makes his way down the ramp.

Cole grabs a mic and asks for the attention of the fans in attendance. He says as much as he would like to compete, he’s medically prohibited. He asks for the understanding and compassion of Lawler, as well as the fans. Cole says there’s nothing he’d rather do than stick his foot in Lawler’s mouth tonight, however his doctor states that Cole can’t compete because his athlete’s foot has become infected, and it’s unsafe for Cole and Lawler. Apparently if Cole puts his foot in Lawler’s mouth, Lawler will contract a disease, so Cole is prohibited from competing. Cole shows his doctor’s note to the ref, but the ref tears it up and has the bell rung.

Lawler begins beating on Cole in the corner immediately, and when Cole tries to crawl away, Lawler rips at Cole’s suit, tearing it to shreds. Lawler hits Cole with a big right hand, and follows it up with a dropkick that sends Cole to the outside. Lawler follows, and Cole begs off before slamming Lawler face first into the steel ring steps. Cole gets back to his feet and shoves Lawler into the barricade. Cole sits on the ring steps and takes off his shoe, then his sock, which is covered in filth. Cole puts his foot in Lawler’s face, so Lawler grabs it, puches Cole, and absolutely launches him through the Cole mine, destroying it in the process.

King sends Cole back into the ring, and he goes up to the middle rope, jumping off and hitting Cole with the flying fist drop. Lawler pins Cole, and gets the three.

Winner: Jerry Lawler

After the match, Lawler begins taking off his show, but he stops, savoring it. Lawler calls to the back, signaling someone, and Eve’s music hits, and she makes her way out to the ring. Eve stands over Cole before she goes to the corner. Eve goes to the top turnbuckle and launches herself off with a big moonsault to Cole. Lawler finally takes off his boot and takes in the fans chanting his name. But…

Lawler calls to the back again, and this time, it’s Good Old JR, Jim Ross, who makes his way out to a huge pop. JR’s got a bottle of his BBQ sauce in his back pocket, and he shows it to the crowd to another big pop. JR takes the top off of the bottle and begins using it to douse Cole. Cole has had enough and he crawls to the outside and makes his way to the back. Lawler is pointing at his foot, but Cole says ‘not like this’, and refuses to go back to the ring. Cole has a mic, and he says it may look like he lost tonight, but he didn’t lose because he’s no loser. Cole calls Lawler a loser, and JR an even bigger loser, before calling the crowd losers. Cole says no matter what happened in the ring, Cole never did, and never will kiss his foot. Cole is interrupted however, when Bret Hart’s music hits, and the Hitman makes his way out!

Hart backs Cole back to the ring, where he tosses him in to Lawler. Hart grabs Cole’s legs, and locks in the Sharpshooter! Lawler uses this opportunity to shove his toes into Cole’s mouth and force him to kiss his feet. King’s music hits, and he, Hart, Eve and JR celebrate while Cole gags on the mat.

– As Lawler, Hart, and Eve make their way to the back, JR hops on the announce team, and it looks like he’ll be joining in for the final match of the evening.

– It is time for a video package recapping the feud between The Miz and John Cena. Expect several minutes for the next match to start.

WWE Championship
“I Quit Match”
John Cena (c) vs. The Miz

Justin Roberts gives us a quick run down of the rules, which basically state you can do anything you have to, to make your opponent say ‘I Quit’. The Miz’s music hits, and the challenger is the first man to make his way out to the ring, and of course he’s got Alex Riley in tow, carrying his briefcase. Cena is the next man out to the ring, and he gets a mixed reaction, but it’s safe to say that most of the voices in the crowd are for Cena, at least at this moment in the night.

We get formal ring introductions for both men, and we’re ready for tonight’s main event, but first…

The bell rings, and Miz asks for the ref’s mic. Miz says out of all the matches Cena could have chosen, he chose an I Quit match. Miz says there are no rules, and that means Miz could hit him with a chair, throw him off the stage, or batter him with the steps, but that means Riley can do it too, so Miz is going to give Cena a freebie, and give him an opportunity to quit right now. Cena says ‘hell no’. Miz goes for the clothesline but Cena ducks it and gives both men a series of clotheslines before he backdrops Riley and hits a facebuster on Miz. Cena hits a gut wrench suplex on Miz and goes for the STF, but Riley breaks it up and begins laying into Cena with right hands.

Riley hits a big suplex on Cena before going back over to the Miz to regroup. Cena is able to back drop Riley to the outside, and he comes up with a couple of big shoulderblocks to Miz before hitting a big belly to back suplex. Cena goes for, and hits the five knuckle shuffle., but when he goes for the AA, Miz fights out and hits a quick combination neckbreaker. Miz goes for the SCF, but Cena fights out and hits the AA. When Cena gets up to his feet, he’s blasted by Alex Riley and the briefcase. Riley uses the briefcase to repeatedly slam down into Cena.

Miz and Riley pick Cena up and they seat Cena on the turnbuckle. Both men shoulder Cena and take him down with a double powerbomb. The ref asks Cena, but he won’t quit. Miz and Riley pick Cena up and toss him to the outside. Both men are quick to follow and they pick Cena up, only to ram him back first into the barricade. The ref asks again, but Cena won’t quit.

Riley takes some of the padding off of one of the ringside barricades, and he and Miz throw Cena into that barricade. Another question by the ref, and another refusal from Cena. Miz and Riley begin dismantling the announcer’s table, Riley holds Cena up and Miz blasts him with a monitor, Riley follows by blasting Cena in the head with another monitor, but Cena still refuses to quit. Cena tries to fight back with a quick flurry of offense, but Miz is able to send him crashing into the ring steps. Miz stands on the steps, and plants Cena with a sick DDT. Miz rips the mic out of the ref’s hands, but Cena still won’t quit.

Miz tells Riley to pick up the steps, and he tells Cena, Riley will smash Cena’s ribs unless he quits. Cena says ‘go to hell’, so Riley brings the steps crashing down on Cena’s ribs, but Cena still refuses to die. Riley heads back into the ring, and he grabs Cena’s arms, keeping him standing on the outside. Miz goes under the ring and grabs a kendo stick, telling the crowd to be quiet. Miz says he’s giving Cena an opportunity to not have so much pain put upon him. He tells Cena to quit, but Cena says Miz hits like a girl. Miz lays into Cena with a nasty kendo stick shot to the gut, then another, then a third. Another hit from the stick and Cena still won’t quit.

Miz hits Cena with a rapid fire series of about ten kendo stick shots, but Cena still refuses to quit. Miz lays into Cena with another stiff shot, but Cena still won’t give. Miz and Riley picks Cena back up to his feet and slam him back first into the barricade, and they begin fighting up the entrance ramp. Miz and Riley slam Cena down onto the entrance ramp, before they go all the way to the top. Miz hits Cena with a suplex, planting him on the steel ramp, but Cena still says ‘no’ when the ref asks him if he quits.

Miz measures Cena and runs right up to him, hitting him with a giant kick to the face that sends him crashing to the arena floor, but Cena still says ‘no’. Miz intstructs Riley to grab the boom camera and Riley holds Cena across the boom, while Miz makes the camera man give him his belt. Miz tells Cena he’s going to whip him repeatedly. He says this will hurt twice as much as the kendo stick, but Cena can save himself the pain. Cena says Miz has the strap, but he has no nuts. Miz begins whipping Cena repeatedly, but Cena will not give up.

Miz whips Cena rapid fire style, but it still won’t be enough to put Cena down. Cena tells Riley to go back to the ring to grab something. Miz begins bringing Cena back toward the ring, and Cena fights back with a couple of quick punches. Cena sends Riley into the steel ring post, but Miz comes up with a chair, and he uses it to blast Cena across the back. Miz rolls Cena back into the ring, and he grabs the chair, bringing it in with him.

Miz goes for another chair shot, but Cena’s up and he’s laying shots into Miz left and right. Riley comes in and Cena sidesteps him, sending him straight into the ref and knocking him out. Miz is able to lay Cena back out. Miz props up an open chair in between the middle and top ropes. Miz gets Cena in SCF position, planting Cena face first into the seat of the chair wedged in the ropes. Riley gets the mic from the ref and Miz holds it in Cena’s face, but Cena still won’t give.

Miz asks the fans in attendance if Cena is their guy, and asks if they want to see him endure any more pain. He tells a kid in the crowd to tell Cena to quit, but the kid says ‘never’. Miz hits Cena in the forehead with the mic, and tells the kid that this is his doing. Miz tells the kid to ask Cena to quit, but the kid won’t do it. Miz lays into Cena with another mic shot to the head before he traps him in the exposed barricade, wedging him in. Miz grabs a chair and says he will hit Cena repeatedly if he doesn’t quit. He tells Cena that he can’t quit this match, and Miz will not stop until Cena says those magic two words. Cena says those kids are smarter than he is. Miz takes the chair and uses it to blast Cena (and mainly the barricade). Riley holds the mic to Cena’s face, and a clearly recorded John Cena’s voice comes over the PA, saying ‘I Quit’, and this one is over (?)

The referee goes for the belt, but he finds a phone, and he begins listening to it. The ref waves off the win, and it looks like this one isn’t over. The ref holds the phone up to the mic, and the recorded voice plays over the PA again. The ref says the match will restart right now.

Miz and Riley go to the outside and Riley tries to blast Cena with the title, but Cena ducks and Riley connects with Miz instead. Cena hits the AA on Riley, sending him through the announcer’s table. Cena turns his attention to Miz, and begins pulling his belt off.

Cena whips Miz all the way up the entrance ramp. At the top of the ramp, Cena locks in the STF, and it doesn’t take long (3 seconds) before Miz quits, ending the match, for real this time.

Winner and STILL WWE Champion: John Cena

The ref hands Cena his title, and Cena holds it up at the top of the ramp while the audience cheers for the greatest wrestling BS of all time.

The PPV ends with Cena holding up his belt and walking toward the back



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